Living in Gratitude...: Don't take things for granted...be integrated!!!

Peace be all...
Let me caution you - Pls take the title with a pinch of salt

I am sure the recent spate of discussion on LKY "Hard Truths to Keep Singapore Going" has affected some of us in one way or the other. When I was learning and discovering Islam during my younger days, the decision to put on the tudung to most of my frens were major issues not with the non-muslims but with the acceptance of our own family members. Having a simple down to earth wedding (non- too malay cultured towards more sunnah-based) was the challenged when we were getting married.

Unknown to us our children will be accused of being less integrated because they turned out to be better practicing Muslim than their parents. Now that as parents, our children will not face the challenges that we had during our early so-called Islamic revival period.

Today, Alhamdullilah putting on tudung is a norm and it is no longer seen as sign of religiousity for some but it become a fashion and a trend. Now u see it and now you don't. I have to say that for my children, I have 3 girls of my own. Now that they are at the age where as Muslim it is obligatory for them to cover their aurat, they have to forgo it when they are in sch uniforms and wear it when they are not.

This is the cost of integration - years ago when they reached school going age we had to weigh between putting them in a madrasah or national school. National school wins because of integration and socialisation - hahaha

- that was the issue right?
Personally I feel it is not us who are not willing to intergrate but it's others who are not willing to accept our differences? Why does the tudung make us an alien in our own country? What is wrong with allowing girls or women cover their hair if they choose to do so and integrate it as part of their uniform? Well...these and many more questions I hope will be eliminated when my grandchildren (insya'Allah) start school and integration will no longer be questioned and people are accepted as individual with no prejudices and may choose to dress the way they desire as long as it is modest. But than again what is modest today may not be so in "secular" definition. I am ever so grateful that the Quran had stated it so clearly the definition of modesty - Alhamdulillah.

I guess LKY was refering to us during the "revival" era where ladies started to put on tudung and an increase in parents to choose the madrasah instead of national schools. However, that was during his era now madrasah students are also integrated in a way...they are seen in more public sphere than they do before. But it is after all the choice of the media to potray them how they deem fit. Am glad that he had since stand to be corrected but what was said had done the harm and grievences...hope it will heal soon bcos some had taken it as hard thruth literally...

There is one thing that I told my children is not to take things for granted...u can argue till the cows go home that this land may belonged to the Malays - that was history! Look at who rules our country now, who owes the economic landscape. I told them point blank - accept the fact that you are a MINORITY in your country and you might as well know your place and work your butt out to prove your self-worth. Not forgetting that by all means you are a Muslim first. The only way i felt for them to really "sedar diri" was to put them through national school and they have to fight and struggle along with the rest of the community.

It is in my opinion (if u wish to slack me for it - i take it) that my children will be "protected" if i put them in the madrasah i.e. by the environment that is not so "kind" outside of the madrasah settings. As parents who lacked the skills of manuevering all the "cruelty" in this world for their own children, we felt that national school is a good training ground for them to take it in small doses. And true enough, the challenges that they brought home make them more resillient.

One example; at P1 my eldest daughter form teacher was an evangilical Christian, she preached about Christianity and even invite her students to Sunday Sch openly. Alhamdulillah, my daughter went home and shared with me what happened. At first I thought it was nothing serious and she just had culture shock coming from a Muslim Childcare to the national school. But things gotten worst and I had to meet the principal and inquire about what the teacher was doing. It was found that the teacher was poaching the students...she was counselled and put under observation and she stopped her preaching.

Other experiences includes the choice of frens they had to make, the food they had to choose in the school or during their school activities. The observations that they can do and can't do and also looking after their daily prayers while attending schools long hours...all these I felt are part of the experience that my children had to go through in the name of integration.

Haiiz...is it worth it, yes we have no choice but to make it worth and continue the journey and face the challenges, insha'Allah they will be better than both of us (their parents) when they become adult and we hope and we pray they will be equiped and have enuf "training" during their school days for them to be successful in their life in this world and especially insha'Allah in the Hereafter too. Personally, we felt that they have tried their best (tho some may disagree because of our (esp mine) parenting style)

and they have done well so far...insha'Allah they will continue to persevere.

Oh Allah, please provide us the wisdom and strength to overcome these challenges and make us better Muslim. To serve and to please You in whatever way we can... Ameeen.